An old Chinese proverb...

You've heard the old Chinese proverb:

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.

Well this weekend, I got a chance to teach a child something that I've never taught anyone before...how to wipe his own butt. (Yes, you read that right.)

Before I go into great detail about it, you've got to understand that I have the great opportunity to teach kids about Jesus every weekend. My responsibilities sometimes go above and beyond the typical "Sunday school teacher" that many think of when I try to explain what I do for a living. I love writing curriculum, I love creative storytelling, I love leading worship, I love working with a great team of volunteers....I don't love helping kids go to the bathroom! One of the first things I ask when new kids come to the preschool room.."is he potty trained?" I have a couple of baby bums I'm responsible for here at home, I don't need a few hundred butts to wipe at church. (For the record: I love kids, just not their bathroom rituals!)

So here is how it happened:

In preschool, we were starting off with prayer as always and the room was relatively quiet as a little girl was on stage whispering her prayer into the microphone. As eyes were closed and heads were bowed, a shout rang out from the bathroom stall in the back of the room, "Someone needs to come wipe my butt!"

I jumped up and hurried into the bathroom to see a little 4-year-old boy sitting on the toilet with his pants and shoes off and his underwear down to his ankles. He said, "Go get my mom so she can wipe my butt!" I asked him if he was serious. He continued, "She's on the elevator, go get her to wipe my butt!" I told him that she's not on the elevator and that she was in big church and I was not going to call her out of church just to come wipe his butt. I asked him why he couldn't wipe his own butt and he said it was because he was afraid it might get on his hand. (seriously)

So, I said I would show him a sure-fire way to never get poop on his hand when wiping his butt. I had him stick out his right hand (assuming that was his wiping hand, but you know what happens when you assume...heheheh...had to throw that one in there!)

Anyway, I took a square and placed it in his palm and told him that it was the first and most important layer of protection. Then, I pulled a long piece and wrapped his hand up to look like a mummy....around the fingers, around the thumb, around the wrist, around, around, around. Then I wadded up a big piece making "a flower" for him to hold onto (which will do most of the wiping) and finished off with one more square for good measure. Then I told him to wipe.

He did, then all the paper fell into the toilet, it just slid off...poop and all! The kid pulled his hand up and looked at it in amazement...no poop! So, I helped him put his pants and shoes back on and had him wash his hands. My job was done!

Now, I'm sure some mom is hearing from her son about the mean teacher at church that made him wipe his own butt for the first time (did I mention that he was 4 years old!)...and I may get a concerned email or phone call about it. If so, I'm ready with my rebuttal, my own Chinese proverb: Give a kid a wipe and you clean him for a day. Teach a kid to wipe himself and you have a great story to tell for a lifetime.

Maybe he'll remember me when he wipes his own butt from now on...oh, one can only hope! : )